The Day of Her (Blessed) Birth
by red-maple-tree
Summary: Kaede's been wasting away in her room, Mikan said! Shuichi and Tenko won't let this go on any longer. But she's avoiding them all. Rantaro, Kaito and the king-sized bear didn't work, so what will? Sometimes, just a fateful day and unwavering support can do the trick...so that Kaede can be with them again. Birthday fic with heavy themes (depression); comfort, and light ship-tease.


**The Day of Her (Blessed) Birth**

* * *

Kaede was looking outside, a look of utter boredom on her face. She wished the day would end faster.

Leaning out of the window; her wheelchair behind her even if she didn't need one _anymore_; arms crossed against the windowsill; she was letting the breeze blow through her hair. The weather was warming up as spring had come, and she could clearly see flowers emerging in the bushes and the trees in the inner courtyard below.

Despite the pretty display of nature taking place before her eyes, Kaede's boredom wouldn't go away. There was just nothing she hadn't already seen; people were coming and going, and sitting and talking; and the nice, honorable pianist wasn't interested in them. There were only nurses, caregivers and a few doctors discussing their patients' health; or workers cleaning up and maintaining the place; they had been taking care of her and everyone else, yet she didn't trust any of them.

Sometimes, Kaede was lucky and spotted some of her ex-friends hanging out and chatting, or taking their meals together. The cafeteria was just nearby, and it made things easier.

* * *

She never joined them. She'd rather watch safely from afar. Trying to keep up somehow with what was happening in their lives while not interacting with them was the best of both worlds.

Strangely enough, today she hadn't seen anyone. No... she actually did see someone. She simply didn't want to think about her.

* * *

Earlier, the blue-haired, blue-clad, _glowing-blue-eyed_ cosplayer came outside to eat breakfast. She sat down on a bench, humming some familiar tune while lifting the cover of the box, and, taking the chopsticks out, she began eating her sushi, her satisfied smile not leaving her once. Kaede rolled her eyes.

"Nice to see that some guys are eating enough in this wretched place. Why am I not surprised that _she_ is the privileged one?"

Before Kaede could have carried on ranting about how some of the patients had access to better food, Shirogane had stopped and greeted her with a wave; Kaede barely made out the words _Hello to you too, Kaede! _but it was enough to scare her out of her wits.

The poor girl had leaned back inside straight away as she hid from Shirogane. Breathing was difficult, and she gasped for air as she was reliving horrendous events. Fortunately, her flashbacks didn't last more than a couple of seconds, but she still felt awful. She didn't understand: not too long ago, the cosplayer had been in the same apathetic state as her and there she was now, smiling and taunting her... It terrified her. And worse, what did it mean for the fifteen of them?

She calmed down progressively as she didn't have to see Shirogane's face anymore in the safety of her room. _A shame she would have to see her in her dreams._

* * *

"I need to get some self-control. I was so weak in front of her." The pianist decided, shaking her head in order to get rid of the fearful memory. She hated so much that the girl had so much power over her that she'd rather believe a lie.

_"Tsumugi can't hurt me...or us...any longer. I think. I hope."_

The nagging doubt she had about their safety wouldn't leave her, so she quickly thought of someone else, and it confirmed that the situation was odd indeed.

"Not even Kiyo was there..."

The anthropologist usually was the first of them to wake up; he arrived in the courtyard before anyone else. It was necessary for his main hobby, _people-watching_; the lonely Kaede ended up developing the same habit than him. He ate his tray slowly and behaved with poise as the others came in groups, and the rest by themselves. The closeness - and the absolute lack of closeness - between some of them was clearly noticeable, however they were all more or less on agreement on one thing. They all stayed away from Shinguji. Then they would leave with the same people they came with, and after observing more, Shinguji would leave as well.

* * *

Of course, the pianist understood their awkwardness towards the taller guy, but she wished that they had all became friends.

That was pretty contradictory coming from her, given her thoughts on Shirogane and, well, the fact that she didn't dare talk to them at all. Therefore, the blonde was in no position to lecture them about the lack of unity they showed. Even worse, she felt like it would be hypocritical of her to lecture them about anything… anymore.

Kaede stopped thinking about the absence of her former friends; surely, they'll come for lunchtime. Besides, an unusual encounter was taking place below.

* * *

A pink-haired woman with glasses...Kaede deeply frowned as she recognized _Miss Manager_. She was self-assured as always, as she was showing the place around to what appeared to be three guests. One seemed particularly happy to be there, and shared their thoughts with the two others who nodded. They talked and looked around, checking files and taking notes from time to time.

"There's nothing weird, and nothing interesting here." The musician concluded in a dismissive manner, almost turning around, before she took notice of something.

"Wait, why is he holding a camera?"

And the four of them disappeared from her sight just after.

She leaned back into her chair and buried her face in her hands in exasperation. The most absurd events had been occurring over and over again in the half-hospital, half-assisted living facility they were living in.

"Why were they going to take pics and film? Do they even have permission? Even so, do they really think this is the place to do that?" She was tired of it all.

She had seen and experienced enough for a lifetime, really. This part of the property was nothing more than the home for the sixteen of them and the staff. Despite that she had seen architects, neurologists, computer scientists, programmers, mechanical engineers, ghost hunters...Elite folks who should have been in the science department of some university...or in the hospital part over there...rather than here, where they - the others anyway - merely ate, slept and played cards every day.

And worse, this place wasn't only strange, it was also _dangerous_. _They had hurt her, after all._ So she would be wary of everything. And it was all she could do.

Yes, nothing made sense here; and it was a dreadful place behind the scenes. But Kaede wasn't the strong, resolute person she had been once. They had killed her soul. She felt weak and empty. She no longer felt like doing anything at all; and as a result, she accepted to just live with the questionable things happening right in front of her.

Taking care of this was a job more cut out for a detective - one she wouldn't bother Saihara with.

Fortunately for the isolated pianist, not everyone who worked here was two-faced and dubious. At least one of them was acting like a regular person.

* * *

Mikan Tsumiki was a nurse yet she carried out the tasks of an assistant nurse. Kaede disliked having to depend on her for the most basic parts of daily life, like waking up, bathing, getting dressed and undressed, going somewhere...Mikan also had to make her bed, bring the meal trays, and dispose of them after. Though it was normal chores for the caregiver, Kaede felt like Mikan was her maid and she was uncomfortable with the whole thing.

But despite the hard work she had to do, and dealing with the so-called crazy Kaede - the nice reputation given to her by the doctors back then - Mikan was never condescending, nor rough in her care. She was anxious and shy, and she really reminded Kaede of Saihara. If the circumstances were different, she would definitely encourage Mikan to be more assertive; but at the moment, the poor pianist couldn't even help herself. Although it didn't mean that she received no assistance. She was given _plenty_ of support, but was full of self-loathing to the point where she felt she deserved to be in this predicament. It was her punishment for her sins, and she would bear it. Kaede wished that neither the nurse nor her former friends were worried about her; they were nevertheless.

The ever-growing pile of stuffed cats and teddy bears and "Get well soon" gifts laying against the headboard of the bed was their way of showing it.

That display of affection soothed her soul because she was _craving_ for human contact, but it didn't change the fact that their love was wasted on someone like _her_. She had hurt them and she wished she could take it all away and disappear forever. Unfortunately, that was impossible, and the closest she could get to it was to not get involved with their lives anymore.

That wouldn't happen today since she found a way to ruin everything again - but with her caretaker this time. The blonde sighed heavily, and laid her forehead on the windowsill as she remembered the previous events. Yes, she managed to calm down Mikan more or less; but the girl had been particularly cheerful this morning, which was uncommon, and the pianist thought she spoilt her mood a little.

"She is always stressed out, but earlier she was beaming and she didn't stutter even one time..." Kaede said with a smile, her eyes widening slightly as she continued to recall.

"Oh now that I think about it, she didn't offer me to come down and eat with everyone...she does usually though."

* * *

This morning, after waking her up and bringing the usual bland and tiny breakfast meal, Mikan helped her showering and putting her clothing on, and afterwards they went back to Kaede's room since she wanted to brush the musician's hair.

Kaede had thought Mikan bothered too much, but in the end she let her do as she pleased, for once that she was in such good spirits. Thus, she hadn't paid much attention to what her friend had been doing. She sat on the bedside as a mirror was handed to her. The caregiver turned around, holding a brush in her hand, opening the jewel case resting on top of the drawer chest nearby and taking five musical hair clips out of it.

Mikan knew something Kaede wasn't aware of yet; that's why she was so delighted. She was sure it would cheer up the miserable girl and as a result, the pianist would get in touch with her friends again. She will confide in them and will feel better. She planned to tell her when everything will be ready, but she was simply too excited waiting for it.

Kaede had recoiled in horror when Mikan put the new, shiny notes in her hair. These were a gift from Miss Manager, for 'bearing the super duper intense treatment that had saved her life'. They were a reminder that Kaede wasn't here willingly; they put her through every step of the process, never asked for her opinion even as she had been conscious since the beginning and could have decided herself. For what reasons did they help her? What was their end goal? She knew it wasn't her well-being.

_Because between letting her die as she was terminally ill anyway and saving her by exposing her to painful therapy, they chose the latter._

It's true that she wasn't hurting all over anymore; her condition had progressed from 'critical - but completely aware of her surroundings' to 'suffering from no particular issues, but cannot live independently'. But was it really worth it when the treatment had been like torture and got her traumatized?

_Even when taking into consideration the agonizing process, as well as the deeper issues she already had... she couldn't get access to the hospital to see a psychiatrist._

That proved her point; they couldn't care less about her state of mind; or worse, it was in their interests to keep her that way.

Whatever their reasons might be, in the end, the pianist wanted absolutely nothing to do with these people, and they could keep their gifts to themselves.

* * *

Mikan flinched when she heard Kaede's yelp; she looked down and saw her paralyzed in fear. It filled her with panic. Things were going great so far; but she messed it up and now Kaede would hate her and she was one of the only ones who cared about trash like her and she didn't want that...

"I-I'm sorryyyyyyy!" She'd shouted, crying and getting agitated. The brush hit the ground. "I ruined everything!"

"No-no, you didn't, I'm the one who scared you, I'm sorry..." Kaede was fumbling for the right words. She had become as frantic as the distressed girl; when Mikan had her outbursts, it was hard to get her to understand that everything was alright, and no one was angry actually.

"N-no, I upset you somehow, I should have been more careful I'm sorrrry!"

"Don't say that." Kaede paused, then reached out and stroked her arm gently, comforting her. "You couldn't have known, and I told you I'm not upset, I was just...uhh...thinking about something terrible so I... overreacted." She finally explained. "You didn't do anything wrong Mikan."

Upon hearing those words, the girl visibly relaxed. She wiped her tears away but her face was still looking glum.

"I hope I didn't spoil your day..."

"Huh?" Her face scrunched up in concentration. "What do you mean by that?"

The nurse yelped in surprise as she seemingly realized something.

"NothingIcan'ttellanythingIhavetogonowcallmeifyouneedmebutnotrightnowpleasebye!" She squealed without stopping to breathe, before running to the door and slamming it behind her, leaving Kaede extremely confused.

"What was that? Uhh...I'm so stupid..." She gave a deep sigh. "I hope she'll be alright..."

She had removed the clips then, putting them away in the case and hiding it in her drawer. _It won't happen again that way._ If only she could throw them out the window.

"Hm... They might kill me if I do that. I shouldn't take that risk."

Finally, Kaede reached for the front-pocket of her king-sized teddy bear. She was smiling softly as she still couldn't believe someone got her something that big. She had pulled out four crooked metallic hair clips that she put on immediately.

* * *

The unpleasant feeling of the chilly wind on her skin brought her back to reality. The weather was becoming cloudy.

"Ugh..." Kaede groaned, moving her wheelchair away from the window so she could close it. She wondered again why Mikan was so pleased, and why she was acting so strange, and now that she looked back on the earlier 'incident', it felt...

"More like she had something cool to say, but she shied away from it at the last moment. Maybe Tenko confessed to her or something like that." She theorized with a short laugh.

She knew Mikan would tell her sooner or later; she wouldn't miss an opportunity to put Kaede in a good mood after all; the idea of something nice happening to her friend was enough to chase away her dark thoughts for now.


End file.
